#10

As I said earlier in #9,

tonight my hair is the way I wish it always was

My clothes are the right color and theyre comfy and don’t look as bad as I envisioned

And I feel like maybe I could reinvent myself if I let go of the idea that I have to be original

Because nothing is ever really original

But maybe thats okay.

The way that my hair is wavy and flows over my shoulders,

The way that its late at night but I’m not angry at myself,

the way that I’m actually looking forward to making something again…

I think those are good things.

I think these are the everyday simple things I should look for.

Maybe original things are pointless,

Maybe its even more pointless to search for them.

When have I ever had an original dream?

A small, warm house with plants and colors was never an original wish,

And a partner who loves me and dances in the kitchen at midnight to silly and slow songs was never an original hope.

But those were always what I wanted.

Maybe…

I should accept the fact that

I am allowed to enjoy things,

And hope for things,

And wish for things,

Even when they are average and boring and unoriginal,

Simply because I deserve them,

and because I will love them.